Focus Group Responses

Question 1: How do you think the character of Ryan is represented?
Question 2: What do you think are the main characteristics of Mrs Greenford are, what do you think she would look like?
Question 3: What do you think Jon would look like?
Question 4: Where do you think this could be set?
Question 5: Compare the men in the boardroom to Jon. What are the differences?

The first person i asked said that Ryan seemed to be very powerless in his role at his work because he was overpowered by a woman who was in higher power than him. She thought that Mrs Greenford was an older woman, who perhaps is not keen on the ways of the younger generation, dresses smartly, and thinks that she is above most people. She thought Jon would wear a suit, but have something more casual to him, such as some lace up shoes, to make him look younger. She thought it could be set in a city. She thought that the main differences between the men in the boardroom and Jon is the fact that Jon genuinely cares about the people he comes into contact with, and the men do not.

The second person i asked said that Ryan was represented as being weak and insignificant, because of the way he acts and the way two other characters talk about him as if he is a child. He thought Mrs Greenford was a young woman, because of the way she gossiped on the phone with someone else and the way she talked to each person differently, but would dress smartly. He thought that Jon would wear something along the lines of a shirt, jeans and dress shoes. He thought it could be set in a small town near a city. He thought a main difference between the men in the boardroom and Jon is that the men seem to be quite manipulative and just want to get the top job, but Jon has the exact opposite way of thinking.

The third person i asked said that Ryan was represented as being weak and idiotic, because of the way he interacts with the characters the first couple of times we see him. She thought that Mrs Greenford was more of a middle aged woman because even though she gossiped on the phone to her friends she still used a older type of language. She thought that Jon would be wearing something that was both smart and casual, so he looked different than the others there. She thought it would be set in the city center where is was full of people. She thought that the main difference between the men in the boardroom and Jon is that Jon was a lot younger and so then could make the people who were only a little younger than him relate to him.

Script Take 3

Third Draft of Media Script.

1, A car park next to a main road, surrounded by office type buildings 9:00AM.

The camera tracks along the front of a large grey building, zooming in on the peeling paintwork and the fading lettering on the front door.

Diegetic sound of high heeled shoes on pavement, a shot of the same feet walking, a smart, business looking woman walks into the building.

BUSINESS WOMAN:

[To receptionist, well-spoken tone] Good morning Mrs Greenford.

The receptionist looks up from her paperwork, immediately putting her papers aside and looking at her computer, then turning to smile at the business woman.

RECEPTIONIST:

Good morning Amanda, would you like me to fax your days appointments to your office?

AMANDA:

[Smiling and nodding slightly] Yes, that would be excellent, thank you.

She walks down the corridor into an office, sits down at her desk and begins to scribble down a few notes on a piece of paper that is on her desk.

The camera returns to the front of the building where once more there is a diegetic sound of shoes, this time scuffing along the floor slightly, a man of around twenty one walks up to the building. Zoom in on his name badge, which reads ‘Ryan.’

RYAN:

[Grins cheerfully] Hey! Uh…

He peers at her name badge, which reads ‘Melody Greenford.’

…Melody!

MRS GREENFORD:

[Peers down her glasses at him, the camera changes to give her a power shot] That is… MRS Greenford to you, Mr Valo.

RYAN:

[Smile fades]Good morning, Mrs Greenford.

MRS GREENFORD:

[Frowning] That is much better. You’ve got some reports that need to be filed [emphasis] IN alphabetical order this time; this will of course be the THIRD AND FINAL TIME.

She then turns away from him and picks up the phone, smirking slightly, and then suddenly becoming more upbeat.

RECEPTIONIST:

Why hello there Angela, how wonderful to hear from you!

RYAN shakes his head and walks into a small room to the left of the receptionist’s desk.

There are some shots of inside the building, of someone cleaning the floor, some people sat in a waiting room and some other general shots.

The camera tracks along the building, once more, diegetic sounds of more footsteps, then a long shot of a man of around twenty five, clad in a dress shirt, black jeans and converse, walking into the building.

The camera zooms in on the receptionist’s face, paying particular interest in the sudden change in her attitude and obvious change of her facial expression.

RECEPTIONIST:

Good morning Jon!

JON:

[Teasing Her] Hey Mrs Greenford, hard morning at the office?

RECEPTIONIST:

[Dramatically] Ah! Only that utter buffoon of an assistant of yours!

JON:

[Sighs] Cut him some slack, he’s only young. Give him time, no doubt he’s in over his head for the time being, he’ll soon get the hang of it.

RECEPTIONIST:

[Purses her lips, seemingly unimpressed] Still, he should-

JON:

[Interrupts her, smiling apologetically] Well, it has been lovely, talking to you, but I really must get some work done.

RECEPTIONIST:

[A bit flustered, clearly not used to being talked to like that] Oh yes, of course, I’ll email you your appointments.

JON nods in response, then walks down the corridor, stopping at a door, and then poking his head round the door before walking into the room and leaning against the doorframe, where RYAN is sat at a desk, as JON walks into the room, he is on his phone, and upon seeing him, he hurriedly puts it back in his pocket, when he sees who it is, he is clearly relieved.

RYAN:

[Dramatically puts his hand on his chest] For god’s sake, do you have to creep up on me like that? I thought it was her coming to ‘inspect’ my working process again!

[When he says ‘inspect’ he turns his hands into inverted commas and has a sarcastic expression.]

JON:

[Smirking] Ah, sorry man, I had no idea you were so.. On edge.

RYAN:

Hey, catch any of the game last night?

JON:

Yeah, pitiful. You joining me for lunch?

RYAN:

[Shrugs] Yeah, sure.

Jon nods, and then leaves the room, rhythmically tapping the doorframe as he goes. He walks even further down the corridor, and then goes into his office.

The door shuts with the camera on the outside of the door. The only diegetic sounds are the keys of the receptionist’s computer and muffled voices. The camera fades to black after showing shots of the waiting room and the corridor, then the outside of the building again.

2. Outside Jon’s office, 11:30AM.

There are diegetic sounds of muffled voices. Then, the door opens, revealing JON and a teenage boy. He walks him to the door, and then opens it for him, letting him past.

JON:

Right, well I’ll see you next week, take care of yourself Spencer, yeah? [Smiles]

Spencer:

[His head bowed] Yeah, seeya.

He walks past him, and out of sight. JON walks back through to a room where some people in smart dress are, it is clear that they are having a meeting, there are notes and clipboards on the table. Jon takes a seat next to the top of the table, in front of the notes he had made on his and Spencer’s conversation. He places his elbow on the table, and fiddles with his pen with one hand.

MAN 1:

[Clears his throat] So, has anybody come to any conclusions?

Man 2:

In my opinion, I think he needs to be kept on a much closer watch; to be sure he is not a danger to himself. If the problems increase, I think it may be time to introduce medication.

There is a collective murmur of agreement, and then MAN 1 turns to JON.

MAN 1:

What do you think Jon? After all, it is your call after all, you are his case worker.

JON:

I’m not so sure if that’ll be necessary, he seems to be a lot more alert and able to cope with things than the last time I saw him-

MAN 1:

[Slightly disbelieving] You really think he’s improved?

JON:

Yes, I really, really do. Last time we met, he was almost too shy to even look at me, now he’s talking almost freely, with a bit more work surely-

MAN 2:

[Calmly] Surely they could be introduced to him though? Merely as a precaution… a safety net if you like?

JON:

[Sighs and pinches the bridge of his nose, closing his eyes] I- I just really don’t think that this sort of action is needed.

[MAN 2 goes to interrupt him again, but JON silences him with a wave of his hand.]

JON:

[A little irritated] No. Let me finish. We’re only just making some good progress, some real progress. It’s took so long to get this far, and I’m not going to throw all that hard work away, both from him and from me.

MAN 2:

[Puts both hands on the table, leaning a little more forward, in a slightly more defensive manner] I should think that given my knowledge on the minds of [Patronizing tone] vulnerable young people, my opinion should be respected and my views put to action, rather than the likes of a man who is barely out of Childhood himself!

JON:

[Scoffs] You can’t learn everything from a book. Sometimes you have to actually try to help them, instead of being in this job for yourself [mocking] Sir.

MAN 2:

[A bit flustered, putting his hands on the sides of his chair as if he’s about to stand] I am NOT going to sit here and let my respected opinion be hacked down like this.

[Jon begins to make a snappy remark, but before he can, MAN 1 stops him.]

MAN 1:

[His tone stating a high level of authority] Jon! Do what you think will be the best for the boy, your opinion is most valued in this case. Not all by any means, but you do know him the best.

[The meeting finishes and various members of the congregation walk out of the room, making small talk at the same time, but JON beelines for the his office, and is shown putting on his coat, and meeting RYAN at the front door]

3. in the local coffee shop. 12:30

[JON and RYAN are sat in a booth in the back room of the coffee shop. The shop is mainly deserted; they are discussing the meeting that has happened previously]

RYAN:

[Curiously] Who was the dude in the suit? He looked like well pissed off at you! What did you do this time?

[Jon sighs, and massages the sides of his temple before answering]

JON:

[Laughing ironically] He was just another business type clone thinking he can read all the books in the world and understand people, and anyone who hasn’t is instantly below him- in fact…

[A waitress comes over with their food; they thank her and begin eating, after a few minutes, JON soon picks up his rant from where he left off, clearly not going to let it go anytime soon.]

JON:

[Irritated] He just… tries to fix things that these people are going through with medication and other crap, he doesn’t listen to them or try to help them himself, or try to make them feel like they’re not alone, just uses them for his research!

[He pauses, waving his hands around, trying to find another lead to go off on a rant about]

JON:

He doesn’t respect the kid’s privacy. Never mind anything else! He goes around, betraying their trust whenever he feels like it! AH.

[He stops, and seems to be more relaxed now all that’s out of his system, RYAN has sat there in silence the whole time, chewing thoughtfully]

RYAN:

[Simply, with no emotion} Dick.

[This sets the mood and atmosphere a lot more happy and humorous. Both men laugh, both seeming more at ease than previously.]

JON:

[Jokily] See Ry that is the reason I keep you around!

RYAN:

[Smirks] I try. I try. So, when do you next meet up with him then?

JON:

[Pauses] Uhh… Friday I think, in the morning.

RYAN:

[Nods thoughtfully, and makes an affirmative noise] Ah, what’re you gonna do then?

JON:

[Sighs] I have no idea. I cannot just betray his trust like that, it’s taken so long for us to get this far, when we first met initially, and he would barely even talk to me for god’s sake.

RYAN:

Well, can you really blame him huh?

[Jon sighs, then the shot fades to black]

Focus Group Questions

Question 1:
How do you think the character of Ryan is represented?


Question 2:
What do you think are the main characteristics of Mrs Greenford are, what do you think she would look like?


Question 3:
What do you think Jon would look like?


Question 4:
Where do you think this could be set?


Question 5:
Compare the men in the boardroom to Jon. What are the differences?

Generic Conventions of Scripts

• The script should be in the font Courier or Courier New font. It should also be in size 10.
• When you introduce new characters, their names should be in bold.
• Stage directions should be separated from the dialogue, using brackets for example.
• Changes of scene should be indicated with a new paragraph with new stage directions.

Television drama show analysis 2

Television show: Merlin

Scene changes;

• Cave

• Outside the castle, on the tower

• Castle hall

• Corridor

• Dungeons

• King's bedroom

• Arthur's bedroom

• Castle hall

• Corridor

• Gaius's room

Story Lines;

• Poisoning chalice

• Knights meeting

• Merlin/Gaius banter in corridor

• Girl putting the poisoned chalice in the hall

• Merlin/Arthur interacting

• Who poisoned Merlin and why

Character moving;

• Angrily

• Fighting

Delivered lines;

• Spell/enchantment

• Humor

• Authoritativeness

From watching the first ten minutes of this episode of Merlin i noted how many scene changes they were, how many story lines were shown, how the characters moved and how the characters delivered lines. The first thing i noticed was that the scene was changed very often, in fact there were ten changes in the time i watched it! They all were quite different places too, one took place in a cave and another in a castle dungeon. All of these different settings had a different story line, sometimes completely different ones too. This will keep the audience hooked as they will want to know how all of these things add up and what happens to all these different characters we are introduced too. As far as the character movement goes, there was lots of fighting and stunt work. When the characters delivered lines there was a lot of humor, making it a better program to watch.

Television drama show analysis 1

Television show: Waterloo Road

Scene changes;

• A boys bedroom
• His kitchen
• In a big house
• In the school yard
• Inside the school
• Corridor
• Staff room
• Stairway
• Back to the staff room
• Headteachers office

Story lines;

• The boy in his bedroom
• Him and his mum talking
• The girls arguing in the house
• Circle of students
• Teacher drama

Character moving;

• They hold various props
• Write on pieces of paper and hand them out

Delivered lines;

• At the start we saw flashbacks in his head.

From watching the first ten minutes of this episode of Waterloo Road i noted how many scene changes they were, how many story lines were shown, how the characters moved and how the characters delivered lines. I saw first that the setting for the scenes changed quite frequently and rapidly, it went from a boys kitchen to a school in under a minute. Because of the quick changes we can see that this was done to make the first crucial few minutes quick and interesting and to make the target audience for the show want to watch it for longer. There was also a lot of story lines presented, from a boy and his mum having an argument  to the teacher drama in the staff room. The aim of this is to keep it engaging and to keep you watching to find out what is going to happen to the people who all of these colorful problems are happening too. The amount of character movement was fairly small, they had students walking around the school with various props and a few people were handing out pieces of paper but that was mostly it. That was to yet again keep the interest in the plot. 

Media script take 2

Second Draft of Media Script.

1, A car park next to a main road, surrounded by office type buildings 9:00AM.

The camera tracks along the front of a large grey building, zooming in on the peeling paintwork and the fading lettering on the front door.

Diegetic sound of high heeled shoes on pavement, a shot of the same feet walking, a smart, business looking woman walks into the building.

BUSINESS WOMAN:

[To receptionist, well-spoken tone] Good morning Mrs Greenford.

The receptionist looks up from her paperwork, immediately putting her papers aside and looking at her computer, then turning to smile at the business woman.

RECEPTIONIST:

Good morning Amanda, would you like me to fax your days appointments to your office?

AMANDA:

[Smiling and nodding slightly] Yes, that would be excellent, thank you.

She walks down the corridor into an office, sits down at her desk and begins to scribble down a few notes on a piece of paper that is on her desk.

The camera returns to the front of the building where once more there is a diegetic sound of shoes, this time scuffing along the floor slightly, a man of around twenty one walks up to the building. Zoom in on his name badge, which reads ‘Ryan.’

RYAN:

[Grins cheerfully] Hey! Uh…

He peers at her name badge, which reads ‘Melody Greenford.’

…Melody!

MRS GREENFORD:

[Peers down her glasses at him, the camera changes to give her a power shot] That is… MRS Greenford to you, Mr Valo.

RYAN:

[Smile fades] Good morning, Mrs Greenford.

MRS GREENFORD:

[Frowning] That is much better. You’ve got some reports that need to be filed [emphasis] IN alphabetical order this time; this will of course be the THIRD AND FINAL TIME.

She then turns away from him and picks up the phone, smirking slightly, and then suddenly becoming more upbeat.

RECEPTIONIST:

Why hello there Angela, how wonderful to hear from you!

RYAN shakes his head and walks into a small room to the left of the receptionist’s desk.

There are some shots of inside the building, of someone cleaning the floor, some people sat in a waiting room and some other general shots.

The camera tracks along the building, once more, diegetic sounds of more footsteps, then a long shot of a man of around twenty five, clad in a dress shirt, black jeans and converse, walking into the building.

The camera zooms in on the receptionist’s face, paying particular interest in the sudden change in her attitude and obvious change of her facial expression.

RECEPTIONIST:

Good morning Jon!

JON:

[Teasing Her] Hey Mrs Greenford, hard morning at the office?

RECEPTIONIST:

[Dramatically] Ah! Only that utter buffoon of an assistant of yours!

JON:

[Sighs] Cut him some slack, he’s only young. Give him time, no doubt he’s in over his head for the time being, he’ll soon get the hang of it.

RECEPTIONIST:

[Purses her lips, seemingly unimpressed] Still, he should-

JON:

[Interrupts her, smiling apologetically] Well, it has been lovely, talking to you, but I really must get some work done.

RECEPTIONIST:

[A bit flustered, clearly not used to being talked to like that] Oh yes, of course, I’ll email you your appointments.

JON nods in response, then walks down the corridor, stopping at a door, and then poking his head round the door before walking into the room and leaning against the doorframe, where RYAN is sat at a desk, as JON walks into the room, he is on his phone, and upon seeing him, he hurriedly puts it back in his pocket, when he sees who it is, he is clearly relieved.

RYAN:

[Dramatically puts his hand on his chest] For god’s sake, do you have to creep up on me like that? I thought it was her coming to ‘inspect’ my working process again!

[When he says ‘inspect’ he turns his hands into inverted commas and has a sarcastic expression.]

JON:

[Smirking] Ah, sorry man, I had no idea you were so.. On edge.

RYAN:

Hey, catch any of the game last night?

JON:

Yeah, pitiful. You joining me for lunch?

RYAN:

[Shrugs] Yeah, sure.

Jon nods, and then leaves the room, rhythmically tapping the doorframe as he goes. He walks even further down the corridor, and then goes into his office.

The door shuts with the camera on the outside of the door. The only diegetic sounds are the keys of the receptionist’s computer and muffled voices. The camera fades to black after showing shots of the waiting room and the corridor, then the outside of the building again.

2. Outside Jon’s office, 11:30AM.

There are diegetic sounds of muffled voices. Then, the door opens, revealing JON and a teenage boy. He walks him to the door, and then opens it for him, letting him past.

JON:

Right, well I’ll see you next week, take care of yourself Spencer, yeah? [Smiles]

Spencer:

[His head bowed] Yeah, seeya.

He walks past him, and out of sight. JON walks back through to a room where some people in smart dress are, it is clear that they are having a meeting, there are notes and clipboards on the table. Jon takes a seat next to the top of the table, in front of the notes he had made on his and Spencer’s conversation. He places his elbow on the table, and fiddles with his pen with one hand.

MAN 1:

[Clears his throat] So, has anybody come to any conclusions?

Man 2:

In my opinion, I think he needs to be kept on a much closer watch; to be sure he is not a danger to himself. If the problems increase, I think it may be time to introduce medication.

There is a collective murmur of agreement, and then MAN 1 turns to JON.

MAN 1:

What do you think Jon? After all, it is your call after all, you are his case worker.

JON:

I’m not so sure if that’ll be necessary, he seems to be a lot more alert and able to cope with things than the last time I saw him-

MAN 1:

[Slightly disbelieving] You really think he’s improved?

JON:

Yes, I really, really do. Last time we met, he was almost too shy to even look at me, now he’s talking almost freely, with a bit more work surely-

MAN 2:

[Calmly] Surely they could be introduced to him though? Merely as a precaution… a safety net if you like?

JON:

[Sighs and pinches the bridge of his nose, closing his eyes] I- I just really don’t think that this sort of action is needed.

[MAN 2 goes to interrupt him again, but JON silences him with a wave of his hand.]

JON:

[A little irritated] No. Let me finish. We’re only just making some good progress, some real progress. It’s took so long to get this far, and I’m not going to throw all that hard work away, both from him and from me.

MAN 2:

[Puts both hands on the table, leaning a little more forward, in a slightly more defensive manner] I should think that given my knowledge on the minds of [Patronizing tone] vulnerable young people, my opinion should be respected and my views put to action, rather than the likes of a man who is barely out of Childhood himself!

JON:

[Scoffs] You can’t learn everything from a book. Sometimes you have to actually try to help them, instead of being in this job for yourself [mocking] Sir.

MAN 2:

[A bit flustered, putting his hands on the sides of his chair as if he’s about to stand] I am NOT going to sit here and let my respected opinion be hacked down like this.

[Jon begins to make a snappy remark, but before he can, MAN 1 stops him.]

MAN 1:

[His tone stating a high level of authority] Jon! Do what you think will be the best for the boy, your opinion is most valued in this case. Not all by any means, but you do know him the best.

[The meeting finishes and various members of the congregation walk out of the room, making small talk at the same time, but JON beelines for the his office, and is shown putting on his coat, and meeting RYAN at the front door]

3. in the local coffee shop. 12:30

[JON and RYAN are sat in a booth in the back room of the coffee shop. The shop is mainly deserted; they are discussing the meeting that has happened previously]

RYAN:

[Curiously] Who was the dude in the suit? He looked like well pissed off at you! What did you do this time?

[Jon sighs, and massages the sides of his temple before answering]

JON:

[Laughing ironically] He was just another business type clone thinking he can read all the books in the world and understand people, and anyone who hasn’t is instantly below him- in fact…

[A waitress comes over with their food; they thank her and begin eating, after a few minutes, JON soon picks up his rant from where he left off, clearly not going to let it go anytime soon.]

JON:

[Irritated] He just… tries to fix things that these people are going through with medication and other crap, he doesn’t listen to them or try to help them himself, or try to make them feel like they’re not alone, just uses them for his research!

[He pauses, waving his hands around, trying to find another lead to go off on a rant about]

JON:

He doesn’t respect the kid’s privacy. Never mind anything else! He goes around, betraying their trust whenever he feels like it! AH.

[He stops, and seems to be more relaxed now all that’s out of his system, RYAN has sat there in silence the whole time, chewing thoughtfully]

RYAN:

[Simply, with no emotion} Dick.

[This sets the mood and atmosphere a lot more happy and humorous. Both men laugh, both seeming more at ease than previously.]

JON:

[Jokily] See Ry that is the reason I keep you around!

RYAN:

[Smirks] I try. I try. So, when do you next meet up with him then?

JON:

[Pauses] Uhh… Friday I think, in the morning.

RYAN:

[Nods thoughtfully, and makes an affirmative noise] Ah, what’re you gonna do then?

JON:

[Sighs] I have no idea. I cannot just betray his trust like that, it’s taken so long for us to get this far, when we first met initially, and he would barely even talk to me for god’s sake.

RYAN:

Well, can you really blame him huh?

[Jon sighs, then the shot fades to black]